BIG BROTHER MADLIB   
 

Erica and I did this madlib based on the reality TV show Big Brother. It's pretty funny, especially if you know the people included. You can do the madlib yourself at http://www.dc8p.com/bigbrother.html

And just a side note, Sunny is one of my nicknames, Rufus is one of Oselle's nicknames and she is a girl. Just felt the need to explain that.

Day 1 - Sunny admits straight away that he doesn't like the look of Kisa. He says she looks like a lesbian. As it turns out, Louise is in fact the only lesbian in the house, although Tim later admits that he is unsure of his true sexuality.

Day 2 - The house sit down for a discussion of how to organise simple chores. Jon creates tension by stating that the kitchen is where the women belong. Rufus hits him with a spork.

Day 3 - The housemates are set their first task by Big Brother - they must make a model of CN tower out of popcorn. After much persuasion by Jon, they gamble 50% of next week's food budget on completing the task.

Day 4 - Training for the CN tower task is well under way. However havoc ensues when Tim, who is rapidly developing a reputation as the laziest fat bastard in the house, eats half the popcorn. Rufus is furious.

Day 5 - Today is the day when the CN tower task must be completed. Things are going well until shortly before the end when Tim farts and blows CN tower over. Big Brother announces that the task has been a failure. Kisa cries.

Day 6 - Jon gets pecked on the arm by one of the Big Brother chickens. Not a very exciting day.

Day 7 - Big Brother is worried that things are getting dull, so he summons the housemates to have a mass debate about sex. After far too many cans of cider, Kisa admits that she likes to be spanked on the arse with a spork. Sunny says he never wears condoms because they make his scrotum sore and Jon agrees. Louise goes into a rant about how none of the other housemates have ever enjoyed a true orgasm because they're all boring heterosexual bastards. Tim sits in the corner, quietly eyeing up Jon.

Day 8 - Today is the first day that the housemates must nominate someone to leave. Sunny goes round everyone one by one, telling them he really likes them because they're the only one in the house that he can really relate to. Rufus and Kisa are voted as the two candidates to leave. Nobody votes for Sunny.

Day 9 - Rufus and Kisa are told of their nominations and burst into tears, before hugging everyone and telling them they love them. Louise sings them a song - hot in here - to make them feel better.

Day 10 - The public vote Kisa out of the house. She pretends not to be bothered but then breaks down and sobs that she should never have admitted about enjoying being spanked. Kisa leaves.

Day 11 - Relationships are strained in the house as the housemates come to terms with Kisa's departure. The food budget is low due to the failure of last week's failed task. Louise has to make do without the cucumber she requested. Rufus is visibly depressed and is comforted by Jon, who tries to touch her on her labia.

Day 12 - The Big Brother pyschologist replays the footage of Jon touching Rufus's labia over and over again. This is because it shows an interesting psychological incident, of course, not because it will increase the viewing figures. Big Brother sets the housemates the task of jogging on a running machine for twice the circumferance of the globe. They gamble 40% of the food budget on completing it.

Day 13 - The running machine task is on target, despite the fact that Tim refuses to run because his scrotum hurts a bit.

Day 14 - Much jubilation in the house as the running machine task is completed. Tim finally manages to run the last 10 metres of the task and claims that without him they'd never have done it. Rufus calls Tim a lazy scrotum.

Day 15 - Once again it is the day when nominations are due. Sunny tells everyone individually that he thinks Rufus is a whore. He also points out that anyone who wants to stay at his flat when the show is finished is welcome to come and visit. Rufus and Jon are nominated by the housemates to leave. Nobody votes for Sunny.

Day 16 - The nominations are announced. Rufus can't believe she's been voted out two weeks in a row. Jon is equally stunned and turns to Rufus for comfort. Tim is distraught and confesses to Louise that he thinks he is in love with Jon. Louise says she doesn't fancy any of the housemates because they're all just too heterosexual and she's a lesbian, you know.

Day 17 - The public vote Jon out of the house. Rufus says she is gutted and even gives Jon a clipping of hair from her labia to prove how much she cares. Tim is also devastated but keeps his hair to himself. Jon leaves.

Day 18 - The Big Brother psychologist shows repeated clips of Rufus clipping the hair from her labia. Apparently this is an important psychological incident. The public obviously agree as viewing figures soar.

Day 19 - Big Brother sets the housemates the task of burping the National Anthem of Liechtenstein in 60 seconds. They gamble 50% of the food budget on completing it.

Day 20 - Nobody has a clue what the National Anthem of Liechtenstein sounds like but Tim says it's a bit like Dancing Queen. The housemates choose Sunny as the one who must complete the task.

Day 21 - Sunny successfully burps not only the National Anthem of Liechtenstein but also God Save The Queen, hot in here and the theme tune to Spy Game. He is proclaimed as a hero, despite the fact that a vote in a tabloid newspaper shows that 98% of the public want to kill him.

Day 22 - Nominations are due and Sunny tells everyone that he has a Villa in the South of France and they can all come and stay for a holiday. Tim and Louise are nominated.

Day 23 - Tim and Louise take their nominations well and sit down with Sunny and Rufus to discuss why they voted for them. Sunny keeps quiet but Rufus accuses Tim of being an arrogant, lazy, self-centred scrotum before bursting into tears.

Day 24 - The public vote Louise out of the house and nobody really gives a shit. Louise leaves.

Day 25 - Sunny becomes the first housemate to have a wank. This footage goes down well with the Big Brother pschologist who proclaims that it gives us a true insight into the working of Sunny's mind and brings out his true personality. In other words, he's a wanker.

Day 26 - Big Brother sets the remaining three housemates the task of shifting 5000 tons of Manatee dung using only a spork. Sunny is unsure but Tim is confident, claiming to have done something very similar when he was younger. They gamble 50% of the food budget.

Day 27 - Completely out of the blue, Tim breaks down in tears and announces that he is leaving. He claims that it is because the dung-shifting task has brought back the painful memories of the Manatee incident from his childhood. Rufus tries to persuade him to stay but Sunny sits in a corner, rubbing his hands slyly. Tim decides to leave.

Day 28 - With only two housemates remaining, the Manatee dung task proves impossible. They fail miserably and resort to getting extremely pissed on some vegetable wine, made by Rufus from a couple of mouldy carrots she found in the Big Brother garden.

Day 29 - Nominations are due for the final time. Sunny asks Rufus to marry him and she accepts. Unsurprisingly Sunny nominates Rufus to leave. Rather more surprisingly, so does Rufus.

Day 30 - When the nomination is announced, Rufus graciously accepts defeat and proclaims that Sunny is a worthy winner. As they are soon to marry, she also agrees to shag him. The event is broadcast live to the nation and is preceded by a speech from the Queen. Everyone in the Big Brother production crew breathe a huge sigh of relief as viewing figures go through the roof. Sunny takes his £70,000 and runs away to Liechtenstein. Nobody, including Rufus, ever sees him again.

Stuff Page Last Updated: October 13, 2002